It's true. I love film. I've wasted my life on the medium. I know the history, but I also know the technical aspects: things like lighting, editing, corporeal special effects.

But I don't want to make films.

Films don't have to cost a trillion dollars. JMM made Superstarlet A.D. for just $16K, and it's gorgeous. But these days, theatres are controlled by multinational chains and are part of the Hollywood conspiracy. Such lo-fi art would never be screened.

Anything I'd want to make would be destined to obscurity. I don't care about the money, but the marketing's a bitch.

Besides which, I've found that fun things are only fun until they become a job.

Mollusks were the evolutionary shit until the Permian mass extinction. What is your favorite mollusk?