Vegetarianism is a luxury. Organizations like PETA tend to overlook that. I spent nearly a decade eating meatless meals and was worse for wear as a result.

It requires a lot of time and a lot of money to be a healthy vegetarian. Our stomachs were designed to extract nutriment from meat. Finding the same in vegetable counterparts requires eating more, pound for pound, and eating a greater variety.

Living in Berkeley, California, I had no kitchen. I had no place to store produce, no place to prepare anything more complicated than pasta. So I ate pasta. And only pasta. Haha.

As I am allergic to dairy, the nutriments I received during my decade of abstenance could be counted with the fingers of a single hand: nicotine, caffeine, riboflavin, niacin, Italy.

I don't mean to disparage vegetarians for what they believe to be a moral calling. I only ask that they bear in mind the burdens that poor, Irish immigrants like myself cannot feasibly overcome.

Your family has before it a variety bucket of chicken. Which bits do you battle hardest for?